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BGP PROTESTERS UTILIZING UNCONVENTIONAL WAYS
During the protests in front of the SNC's HQ, journalists from around the world have seen Lefantchi Crime Family supporters gluing themselves on lampposts.
Multiple SUS vehicles flocked the parking spaces of Plaza Dicen. Armed with ladders, cranes and specialist equipment, the utility workers were dumbfounded by what they saw.
We asked some LCF supporters about what the hell are they doing. Here are some of their statements we took using hidden microphones.
Statement 1 - Joey "Nostra" Marino:
"Yo, listen up, world! Joey 'Nostra' Marino here, holdin' it down with my crew. We glued ourselves to this lamppost 'cause we're ride or die for the Lefantchis! Snowcons, you think you can just lock 'em up and throw away the key? Not on our watch, bros! We know these guys got hearts of gold under that tough exterior. They're a family, a brotherhood, and we won't let anyone tear 'em apart. Free the Lefantchis!"
Statement 2 - Maria "Viper" Romano:
"Hey, all you squares out there, it's Maria 'Viper' Romano. We're stickin' to this lamppost like glue 'cause we're sick of the Snowstone pigs tryna take down the Lefantchis. They may be rough around the edges, but they're our blood, our familia. We've seen 'em helpin' the community, holdin' us down when no one else would. Snowstone Constabulary, you better listen up 'cause we won't back down! Release the Lefantchis now, or you'll feel the sting of our bite!"
Statement 3 - Tony "Brick" Santoro:
"Yo, Tony 'Brick' Santoro in the house, representin' for the Lefantchis! We're stuck to this lamppost like cement 'cause we know the truth. Snowcons, you can't just come in and snatch away our heroes. These guys are legends, protectin' our streets and keepin' the balance. They got respect, honor, and loyalty runnin' through their veins. Let 'em breathe, Snowstone, or you'll have an army of bricks comin' your way. Free the Lefantchis or face the consequences!"
Meanwhile, just about 2 kilometers from the SNC HQ, the noises of the petrol bombs engraved themselves in the memory of the residents who were taking their casual morning vodka. One resident is sure that the LCF supporters have done it. Is this the start of violence with the same level as the Troubles?
One mobile press vehicle has just received a video tape, with the video creator confessed to being the one who threw the petrol bomb. Here is the full transcript.
Transcibed by Jesusimo Bonzales
"Yo, listen up, world! It's Lexi "Firecracker" Moretti, and I'm about to drop some truth bombs on ya. So, yeah, I threw that petrol bomb, and I ain't ashamed. Lemme tell you why. The Lefantchis may have a rep for doin' some shady stuff, but they're our family, our They don't know what it's like in these streets. They think they can play heroes, but they're just a bunch of power-hungry pigs.
You see, Commissioner Kai, he's actin' all high and mighty, like he's got it all figured out. But he's just as dirty as the rest of 'em. They think they can bring down the Lefantchis? We're smarter, tougher, and more loyal than any of 'em. They can't touch us.
So, I lit up that petrol bomb to send a message. We ain't gonna let 'em mess with our familia. Snowcons, Comkai, you better watch your backs. We're not playin' around. We'll keep fightin', keep hustlin', and keep standin' up against your corrupt ways."
End of Transcript
Meanwhile, Commissioner Joseph Kai Yao Sip, in response to the video, made a statement riddled with slang terms from Hong Kong (He's from there, so calm down).
"It's quite ironic you're defending them while accusing me of being on the take. You might as well be speaking nonsense like a gwai lo (foreigner) trying to fit in."
Expect violence similar to The Troubles. Be sure to stay safe and know the contact information of the relevant authorities.
PETROL PRICE HIKE CONSIDERED A "BLESSING"
Ask anyone about their reaction for the petrol prices increasing and expect them to moan about how crazy the prices were. Ask someone from Snowstone, however, and they'll treat it as a blessing. Why though?
We did an interview, and the most common response is that they count it as a blessing because petrol bombers will be forced to take petrol from their beloved cars, vans, or anything that they have.
In fact, the "blessing" thing is still true because during yesterday's riots, there were reports of petrol bombers. The price increase forced the bombers to look for every penny to fund their destructive means.
The SNC also shares the same view as the public. Constable Maya Irsandi told us this:
"I mean, imagine those petrol bombers now, scratching their heads and going, "Aiya, how we gonna make a statement without burning a hole in our wallets?" Maybe they'll resort to throwing water balloons filled with chili sauce instead of petrol bombs! Can you imagine the poor victims getting splashed with spicy goodness? They'll be running for a glass of milk quicker than you can say "fried rice"!"
Seriously though, don't throw petrol bombs.
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