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Stupid jokes

81.6k Himynameiswalrus  7.4 years ago

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the"p" is silent. What do you call an alligator that wears a vest? An investigator. How much does a hipster weigh? And insta-gram. What do you call a nosy pepper? Jalapeño business. What's at the bottom of the sea and shivers? A nervous wreck. Share your bad jokes below.

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    Erm ok. But um, type O (typo?) you know... Gud joke... @dootdootbananabus

    6.9 years ago
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    18.8k NexusGaming

    @TheFlyingDerp but if you add one hydrogen and 2 oxygen,you get rain

    6.9 years ago
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    18.8k NexusGaming

    @aircraftarsenal123 type o blood... oof if it's o positive... whatever

    6.9 years ago
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    2,269 GooseSan

    I'd make a chemistry joke but there would be no reaction.

    7.2 years ago
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    A store was selling dead batteries... FREE OF CHARGE.
    When does the prime minister work, "PMs dont work in the AM

    7.3 years ago
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    -A dyslexic man walks into a bra
    -A soldier who has survived pepper spray and mustard gas in war is now a seasoned veteran
    -German sausage jokes are the wurst
    -PMS jokes aren't funny. Period.
    -I know a guy who is addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop anytime
    -How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it
    -When you get bladder infection, urine trouble :3
    -I thought I had type A blood, but it was a Type O
    -Energizer Bunny arrested: Charged with battery

    7.4 years ago
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    12.5k Ian1231100

    At first I thought the frisbee was getting bigger.
    Then it hit me.

    What has wheels and flies, but is not an airplane?
    A garbage truck.

    Remember Trevor in GTA V used to be in the air force?
    They kicked him out because he was plane crazy.

    7.4 years ago
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    -what do you call a fish with no eyes?
    A fsh!

    -Ever heard of those two guys that stole a calendar?
    each one got six months

    -Why was Peter Pan banned from using any Airline?
    Because if he got on a plane, it would Never-Never-land.

    7.4 years ago
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    9,481 Razor3278

    What did the ocean say to the other ocean?
    Nothing. They just waved at each other.
    .
    .
    When do onions see each other?
    When they have a re-onion!
    .
    .
    What do you call a snake that's 3.14 feet long?
    A πthon!

    7.4 years ago
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    50.7k ChaMikey

    Why did Anakin cross the road?

    To get to the dark side.

    7.4 years ago
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    13.9k Fjorge

    What can you eat but is not edible? Everything, but good luck.

    7.4 years ago
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    What do you call a guy with no arms and legs on the porch? Mat
    What do you call a swimmer with no arms and legs? Bob
    What do you call a guy with no arms and legs hanging on the wall? Art

    7.4 years ago
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    47.9k Phantomium

    Worst joke I could think of? USA and OIL in a room...

    7.4 years ago
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    Why did the rocket lose his job?

    He got fired!

    7.4 years ago
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    @Shmexysmpilot .....

    7.4 years ago
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    8,104 LofiTurtle

    I would tell you a joke about perforated paper, but it was too tearable

    7.4 years ago
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    @jamesPLANESii yes he did

    7.4 years ago
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    Did you say the whole joke on the first one? I don't get it... @RussianPineapple

    7.4 years ago
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    @Tully2001 the end is a pun. If the story extended a few more lines, it would look like any other short story. The pun gave me a giggle, I admit.

    7.4 years ago
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    Guess why the world be like it do? cuz it do

    7.4 years ago
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    @Himynameiswalrus سكبنلحثثي بميسمين سميث يم!

    7.4 years ago
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    @Himynameiswalrus what is the difference between a bycicle?
    A banana because vests don't have sleeves.

    7.4 years ago
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    @RailfanEthan oof

    7.4 years ago
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    Why did the chicken cross the road?
    To get to the idiot's house.
    Knock knock.
    Who's there?
    The chicken.

    7.4 years ago
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    14.4k BirdOfSteel

    @Tully2001 HERE COMES THE BEST JOKE OF ALL TIME: my life....

    7.4 years ago
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